Few pages of my book

On a Radhasaptami night, due to the lack of the sun rays at night, my mind seemed to act weird, thus writing these thoughts. I even asked my dad a while back about my dilemma, which was seeded by him 36 years back by naming me Goutham, who removed all the goal posts (read desires). As I chant Nirvana Satakam every day, which says I have no mother/father/teacher/friend/Veda/yagna, there is one and only eternal soul which is pure bliss, I started to delineate myself from everything around me, including my own family members. During the family crisis and issues, pain to the closest family member or the biggest fights with the nearest people caused me distress. So, I had to remind myself and digest Nirvana Satakam concept a lot more often to relieve the emotional pain to thus disassociate me from not feeling associated with any of my close family members. Similar to the family connections, I have also disassociated with the objects and goals around me. Whether it is a fancy car, luxurious

1300 kms of travel, 7 families, 2 months of planning, innumerable myntra, h&m, ajio orders & returns, 5 meetings to decide the location of Goa- for the new year to set it as the 'lifetime event', and on the night of new year, we were shocked to see marriage reception like party where an old man hosting retero soothing songs and childish games, and the audience are casually sitting in the chairs like they have come to witness a school event. However, our group didn't step back, instead of waiting for someone else to create a rocking environment, we put on the dancing shoes to set the floor to fire.   That's the way our new year end. Day 1 (28 -Wed): Journey of 650 kms from Bengaluru to Panjim, which has a steady degradation of roads from 3-way lane -> 2-way lane -> then to 1-way lane -> halfway and then ghats before reaching our resort. Best part of the journey was the drive through the thick jungle the road was covered with a canopy of trees shade, whic